EMPOWERED WOMAN

1) Give yourself approval to move from girl to woman. It may seem like a simple idea, but it is one that is often resisted for all the reasons mentioned above. Have a good, long talk with yourself. Tell your self that you are not only allowed but entitled to act in ways that move you toward goal attainment. Try the mantra I am entitled to have my needs met too.

2) Visualise yourself as you want to be. If you can see it, you can have it. Picture yourself in the role to which you aspire. If it’s in the corner office, see yourself at the desk with the accoutrements that go along with it. Consider the behaviours in which you will engage to warrant this position and the ways in which you will act. Bring them into your reality.

3)Talk back to the fearful voice inside your head. This may sound crazy at first, but you must counter the old messages and replace them with new ones. If your fear girls voice says, “but no one will like me if I can change”, let your woman’s voice respond with, that’s an old message. Let’s create a new more empowered one”.

4) Create the word on the street. A routine exercise we do in the leadership classes is to ask participants to write a few words vision statement of how they want to be described, then list the behaviour needed to get them there. You can do the same. Write up specific actions to make it happen.

5) Recognise resistance and put a name to it. When you find others resisting your efforts to be more direct and empowered, consider first that their responses are designed to keep you in a less powerful place. Rather than accept, question it. Say something like, “it seems you don’t agree with what I am saying. Let me give you the rational for my position and then perhaps you can tell me what it is you take issue with”.

6) Ask for review. If worried that you are in the same way inaptly, ask a trusted friend or colleague for feedback. Avoid asking a yes – no question, try asking open – ended questions that will give you insight in to how you are seeming.

7) Don’t aim for perfection. There are some that are just so counter to our personality, I don’t try; others that no matter how hard I try, I don’t do well. The important thing is to do a few well and allow the rest to fall into place.

8) Wedge out negativity. Surround yourself with a armour that allows you to see what is going on around you, but not be punctured by the negativity of others.